Month: January 2013

Every morning, by 6:15am I go jogging for about forty minutes. It’s practically a ritual… Years ago, it started off as an excuse to spy on my ex-boyfriend. Jogging past his house in the mornings, I was able to see what new ho’ he had spent the night with. Before you judge me, you have to bear in mind that this was in the age prior to Facebook and Twitter. We didn’t have it as good as the girls of nowadays. In today’s world, when your boyfriend tells you “Baby, I’ll call you back later. I’m in a crucial meeting…

Continue reading

Hey people!!! It’s been a while… five days to be precise. And a lot has happened in that time. I had planned on coming here to lie about how busy I’ve been this past week but there’s no point. The truth is that I tried to effect some necessary changes on my website and managed to make a complete mess of everything. I activated some things and deactivated some others and ended up with a Christian Gardening porn site. Finally, I let down my pride, called for help and got everything sorted out. However, for now, please ignore any pop-up…

Continue reading

Dear You, I remember on the second day… you told me, or should I say you warned me not to fall for you. When you said it, it took all my will power to not laugh in your face. In my mind, I was wondering, “Who the hell does this nicca think he is? Denzel?” You see, I’ve heard guys say that to me a gazillion times before and in my opinion, if you’re not Hugh Hefner or a shirtless Tatum Channing, then you really don’t have the charm to pull off that kind of confidence. In fact, coming from…

Continue reading

Everybody knows a prophet. I don’t mean prophet in the “divine” sense of the word. I’m talking about maybe a pastor, or a church usher, chorister, church cleaner, pastor’s-ass-kisser, sound technician etc. Basically, anyone who does work for the church. Today’s focus is not your average, everyday church worker though. Today, we’re dealing with the ones who sweep the church floors as if their ancestor was the Mayor of Sodom and Gomorrah. They use their work in church to apologize to Jesus on behalf of their great-great-great-great-grandfather on their father’s side, the man who bought the hammer and nailed Him…

Continue reading

Recently, for the one billionth time in my life, I was sorta dumped came to the end of yet another relationship. Don’t ask… it’s a long story. Anyway, the sorta-dumping happened at the worst possible time because I had to make a lot of public appearances in the days after; I had two job interviews, I had errands to run, I had a social event to attend, I had a sick friend I had to visit and other minor things that took me out of the house. So basically, the sort-of-dumping happened in the middle of life. I didn’t have…

Continue reading