To toast or not to toast…

Goooooood Morning people!!!!! šŸ˜€ On Monday, I wanted to tell you about my recent attempt to start dating again. Before now, I always used to say that Iā€™m never going to meet a man on my own. Why? Because Iā€™m not very friendly. I’m not the kind of girl you can stop along the road to ask for the time or ask for directions. I will literally chew your head off… Iā€™ve learnt from personal experience and Movie Magic that there are so many freaks out there and I donā€™t consider myself to be a very good judge of character.ā€¦

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Roofology MSc, PhD part II

Good morning people!!! Remember I told you guys about the roof people who came to do repairs a few weeks ago… well, they couldnā€™t agree on a price with the landlord. The landlord said that Julius Berger wouldnā€™t be that expensive, so they left after two days. I was relieved when they left because honestly, I would rather continue with my bucket-under-holes-in-the-ceiling method of keeping the house dry any time it rains. That would be better than having random labourers trooping in and out of my house… (yes, I realise how foolish that sounds) Anyway, the landlord sent another setā€¦

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What would your village chief say?

Hey people… I’M BACK!!! Iā€™ve got a few people who are upset with me for all sorts of reasons. Iā€™ll be honest; there are some that I couldnā€™t care less about and some that although I hope they will eventually get over it, life will go on if they donā€™t. I’m saying this because I used to be very petty… to tell you the truth, I still have the tendency to be. Itā€™s not something to be proud of, but I can hold a grudge over the tiniest thing for years and years. Itā€™s so bad, that I still havenā€™tā€¦

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To all oil block owners…

Good morning people… You canā€™t imagine how unhappy Iā€™ve been… not angry with the world as usual, not irritated or cranky, just plain unhappy. Iā€™m talking the kind of unhappiness that thereā€™s no funny side to. And thatā€™s coming from someone who cracks boko haram and Indian bus ride jokes indiscriminately… My baby bro left on Sunday. I cried at the airport and in the taxi on the way back home. Then I cried some more at home. It wasnā€™t my customary sexy tears-falling-silenty-down-my-cheeks cry… it was a my-husband-is-being-deployed-to-Iraq-and-heā€™s-gonna-die-by-shrapnel kind of cry. Yes, I disgraced all of you šŸ™ Myā€¦

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Suicidal questions to ask Ngo…

Good morning peopleā€¦ How was your weekend? I had one of those stayed-indoors-from-Friday-to-Monday-morning weekends. I didnā€™t go anywhereā€¦ my neighbours probably think Iā€™m dead. I got some much needed rest thoughā€¦ the last couple of weeks have been really hectic! Did I mention that my baby brother is around? Iā€™ve been looking forward to his visit since the beginning of the month. In fact, since the beginning of the year! Before now, I hadnā€™t seen him in over THREE years!!! Itā€™s just been phone calls, texts and MTCN numbers the whole timeā€¦ ( ._.) Anyway, recently, Iā€™ve been having conflictsā€¦

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