A few nights ago, I spilled a huge mug of piping hot tea on my bed…
My phone got the most of the tea and hasn’t been able to come on since then. I shake it and I can still hear tea swishing around inside. Everyone asks, “Did you put it in rice?” and I act like I never even considered it. First of all, I don’t have rice (because diet). Secondly, the body of the phone is so sticky from all the sugar that was inside the tea. Putting it in rice would’ve just resulted in sweet raw rice and a still-bad phone. It would make more sense to use the phone to soak garri.
After the spill, I removed my duvet and my sheets, and hung my jotter to dry. I had to sleep curled up at one end of my mattress, above the brown stain that looked like the map of a continent.
The next morning, I put my sim in an ancient 10-year old Nokia phone and now I rely on my spidey senses to identify familiar numbers and recognize people’s voices.
Anyway, Happy New Year guys!!! So far, my year has been good-ish. It hasn’t gone according to plan but I’m hopeful.
The best news so far is, I’ve moved to a new place! It’s smaller than my old place, but I love it. It’s more affordable, quieter, and it’s a more sensible environment.
My old place used to leave me feeling so angry with God. I used to have a 25 year old Interior designer neighbour who lived in a 2.5M-per-year flat and drove a white Range. Meanwhile, in my two years there, I never once saw her hold a fancy lamp or a flower vase.
One day, she gave me a pep talk about how to be a self starter. She said, “Ngor leave this church tin… Stop sitting around, feeling sorry for yourself. Heaven helps those who help themselves.” She ended the talk by asking me to draw up a business plan so that she could review it and see if we could go into a partnership.
Because I’m a mumu who always considers the “What if’s”, I really drew up a business plan. She must’ve used it as wallpaper in a client’s house because we never spoke of it again.
My new landlady is the coolest landlady on earth. I hardly ever see her though. On Wednesday, after church, she sent her house help to give me a huge wrap of Amala and a big bowl of meat with tiny soup. I went over to the house to thank her and she admitted that she worries about me sometimes. She thinks I’m abnormally quiet.
She was surprised when I moved in less than two hours after I met her and we concluded our agreement. “Ahn ahn! What’s the hurry?” “Don’t you want to paint first?” “Won’t you do some work in the room first?”
I assured her it was fine. By 10am that morning, I showed up in a truck with all my stuff. I cleaned the room while my AC guy installed my AC. I got her cable guy’s number and he wired my cable. I plugged in my fridge and my electric kettle (for tea that me and my phone would later drink) and I settled in. I’m taking my time to do everything else. For now, this is home.
Also, this year, I’ve been actively working on worrying less… or not worrying at all. I worry about all sorts, from big things to small things. I worry so much that I worry about what my worrying will do to my health. And for someone who is a tongue-firing, bible believing Christian sister, it doesn’t say much about my faith in God does it?
Anyway, in a bid to help my worrying, I’m trying out meditation. I’ve done some reading on it and tried to practice a few times with mixed results. The first time, I over-relaxed and I fell asleep while trying to focus on my breathing. The other two times, didn’t do much. I’ll keep practicing though. Maybe next time you hear from me, I’ll be on some Dr Strange shi’… writing blog posts while levitating inna de ear.
That’s ‘in the air’ for all you non-Jamaican readers.
Happy New Year guys.
Happy new year to you too.
Paint house? I don’t understand doesn’t the land paint the house for you?
Where I am from landlords paint the house and take care of any repairs before a tenant moves in. No one in their right mind would rent a house that is not painted or needs fixing up. Sometimes when a structural thing needs fixing after you move in and the landlord is taking their time to fix it you just do it and deduct from the rent coz we pay monthly.
You! How have you been?
Now I feel kinda silly about the painting thing. I honestly didn’t think about it because I was in such a desperate rush. I’m her first tenant so I want to believe it didn’t occur to her too.
And by God’s grace, I will not be in this place next year. Amen!
Have Bn A Fan Of Your Blog since day one. *it makes more sense to use it and soak rice* and its still ever funny. Call me now. I want to come to your new house. We have a lot of catching up to do. I MISS YOU. Happy Valentines Day
Sweerie… happy Valentine’s day to you too! Thank you for reading since day one. You don’t know how much I appreciate it.
We do have loads of catching up to do, I know. I’ll call you later in this new week.
I think it’s a great idea to stop worrying, meditation works, it’s hard though like you said, it’s easy to fall asleep but when I went to yoga class once the instructor said it was good to fall asleep that it means you are relaxed. she had to wake some people up after the session was over, I just thought of myself snoring loudly and iv decided not to fall asleep! Am glad your landlady is kind, am very sure God will reveal his wonderful purpose for you soon, just trust! Meanwhile this new font is very cool oh! Fancy!
LMAOOO! If you snore loudly nko? They will be alright jor…
And yes, she’s the best. She’s moving soon though and someone else is taking over. I’m just praying for the same sanity level.
Thank you Ebose. And Amen.
You left me in fits of laughter again. What’s your facebook Id?
Lol… It just Ngozi Orji o, but it seems we are plenty.
Half the girls in Igbo land are called Ngozi.
Engoziiiiii (do you remember who pronounces your name like that), Happy New Year, long time, no hear. Thank God for your kind Landlord ooo, they are hard to come by. Btw send me your business plan, maybe we can partner on something (forming white range driving geh), lol.
My love! Thank you so much!!!
ps: Looking forward to another bowl of Amala ati gbogbo e 😉
Happy New Year Dear … When you feel yourself worrying, remember that in the everlasting grand scheme of things, nothing matters, absolutely nothing! This is not your first time around the block, neither will it be your last! …But then again, It may be your last, who am I to say otherwise. when you get to that state of nothingness and emptiness, then you will truly begin to see the miserable plight that Humanity has dug for itself and the simple solution to all (y)our problems in Black and White. “He that will seek to gain his life, must lose it …” When you start losing it Ngo, then you will start gaining it and gradually you will wake up, gradually! You haven’t even started, but the process is the process … You cannot pour water into an already full jar. It’s no easy task! Though it’s a good start, Meditation 🧘♀️ will not eradicate your worries Ngo … Spiritual Understanding of just who and what you are, will. The Rice (or Garri) thing really does work though, you should have a bit more faith in it. Cheers!
Thanks dear… 🙂