Dear Friend,
Welcome to my blog!!!! I’m very pleased you took the time to stop by.
I’ve always been the kind of girl to put my thoughts down on paper. Sometimes, they are quite clever and fascinating, sometimes they are funny, and at other times, when I go back to read what I wrote, they make me question my sanity. Little did I know that a long time ago, somewhere in the universe, the stars had aligned and my blogging fate had been sealed… I was destined to bitch and whine on the internet!
You see, around the same time my parents were adopting me, Mark Zokerburg Zucckeborge Zuckerberg’s mum and dad conceived him. Fast forward many many years later to when he invented Facebook and the status update question, “What are you doing?” which later became, “What’s on your mind?”. Suddenly, I had an avenue through which I could share with my friends all the crap that crossed my mind on an almost daily basis. Some of them, my friends, encouraged me to start a blog, some (like me) inwardly questioned my sanity and others, the sensitive ones who are easily offended, simply “un-friended” me.
It took months and months to pick up the courage to finally get this going. I had 4.72million reasons not to start this blog. First of all, in this day and age of easy internet access, every Tom, Dick and Babatunde is a certified blogger! I felt that one more blog by an attention-seeking wanna-be writer in the Blogosphere would be one blog too many. Secondly, I didn’t think I was interesting enough. I don’t watch the news because of how utterly depressing it is, so I’m always the last to hear about whatever Dame Patience boko haram has bombed. It took a while before I realised that ‘PIB’ was not a new position named after Bill and Monica. That’s just me… the most adventurous thing I do is dream about doing adventurous things. So what was I going to write about?
Lastly, I was scared (still am) that I would lose a few friends. Why? Well, because my honest-to-God opinions would be put out there. They’ll know what I think of their fear-inducing eye-shadow, or their low-life boyfriend… or maybe even get to find out the kinds of things their father says in his sleep 😉
Alas! I decided, if Tom, Dick and Okechukwu can do it, why can’t I??
So here I am at last.
Bloggerring 101 says to always have a topic or main focus in your blog. I don’t have one. On this blog, we (yes, “WE”) are going to talk about everything. We’ll discuss whatever is going on around the world, there will be some self-help how-to lists that I don’t really expect you to take seriously. There will be stories to tell, most of them true, others embellished. I’m hoping that people will write in so that I can share their letters (if they want). However, on slow days, I will most likely just make something up. Something juicy and scandalous, then I’ll put it up here like it’s a letter from a reader. So any time you see one of those ‘Dear-Readers-I’m-a-lesbian-crack-addict-who-is-pregnant-with-my-brother-inlaw’s-baby-so-do-you-think-I-should-tell-my-best-friend-that-she-has-body-odour?’ letters, just know I made it up. Finally, depending on my mood, and the time of the month, there will be a lot of ex-bashing.
As I have a tendency to ramble, I tried to keep this brief and to the point so I’ll end now. Besides, I can sense one or two people nodding off already. Once again, I’d like to thank anyone reading this, including the people I threatened and those I paid. Thanks for stopping by. Please visit again… and again.
God bless!
Beautiful, funny writing style. Definitely something I could look forward to reading after a long day @ work in 2013!
Awww… thank you Vicky. Glad you like it. This is my very first comment!! Happy 2013! 🙂
NG, great 1st post. Having seen your FaceBook posts, I’m excited to see what the rest would hold. I wonder what the Hausa version of “Tom, Dick and …..” is.
That would be Tom, Dick and Babangida 🙁
Thank you SO much Brendan…
Finallyyyyy!! Looks like its going to be a good year afterall 🙂 . Always on point… Can’t wait for the next post. Keep ’em comin..
Thank you Ghosty!! I’ll try hard… 😉
Thanks for finally getting around to doing this. Opening up and letting people take a peep into our minds is always a scary thought. I guess you finally gotten over your fears:) good for you I musta add!
I hope somewhere down the line you add a feedburner feature to this blog so we can get direct emails sents to us with each new update and don’t have to keep coming back here like junkies in search of a fix.
Keep it coming.
Thanks so much Ebuka!!! Yeah, I’m still getting over my fears. You had me on Google trying to find out what the hell a Feedburner feature is… surprisingly, it isn’t a stove where we burn farm animal feed! I’m working on it. Muah!!
finally! 2013 is going to be a great year with your voice over my left shoulder (of course the right shoulder wouldn’t be appropriate)……love ya, keep it coming!
LOL!!! I’m fine with the left shoulder… let the guy dressed in white, with that silly halo above his head stay on your left 😉
Thanks Cathy. Love ya too babes…
I always look forward to reading your posts on facebook mostly because it funny as hell and reminds me of what distance and time has taken away from me. I am proud of you for finally doing this and i really look forward to coming down here each day so i defintely agree with Jon pol (Ebuka). Send alerts so we don’t have to keep coming back like every second looking for a fix like junkies. Much love doll…….
Eddie baby!! Thanks love… I’m working on the Feedburner thing. So many options!!! And we’ll have to work on what distance and time have taken from “us”. Happy New Year sweetie… :*
My one and only NGOOOOOOO #in dat voice# . Keep it coming love. Happy new year sweety
Happy New Year Ety!!! We’re seeing soon abi?
Thanks luv…
what voice? hey! what voice I ask you. Reveal you answer!!!
Oh Pope! I don’t even know why I’m laughing… Who the HELL are you talking to? Remember, what the Dr told
usyou: The voices in your head are badd!!Oh Lordy, I’m on some Lastma ish with this arent I? NG! Ur doing it darling, finally getting that gem of a wit out there. I’m beaming like u were my first child/love/….(totally wierd thot but hey) Proud of u dear, and I will be following this.
LOL!!!! @ Lastma ish… Haven’t heard that one before!!
Awwww… Thanks luv. I knew you would be proud 🙂 Too bad I suck at advertising though.
I didn’t even know there was a tick box till my friend told me this morning. I’ve read so much about Feedburner, and I still don’t know shit! It’s confusing 🙁
And about the feedburner thing, dont worry about teching things up too much now, just focus on the content, I’m sure folks can get by with the little “Notify me of new posts by email” tick box at the bottom there.